Paul's Place Gig, 9th December 2005: Airtight Noise's 3rd Performance

I do remember how our band's first performance, in Colors Uptown, Damansara. Me and cy were very nervous that time, we couldn't speak, we tried to make a conversation, but it didn't last long. We kept quiet, thinking of how's gonna be if it's our turn to perform. Our heartbeats went fast, body shivering and dare not to look at the crowds. It's a very good experience for us to overcome our fear.

Then the second gig was in Bangsar, still me and cy performing, and that's where we knew Keng, the guy who owned the jamming studio in Tmn Desa, hosting the gig. Yulius and Eleanor came to spectate, and we did screw up, cy's guitar strings were out of fret, he hurt his fingers, and i got some fucked up beats after a while i was looking at cy's fucked up guitar. That time we had recorded audio and video, i think Ps was holding the video camera, and Eleanor was taking pictures, correct me if i'm wrong. All my life, i ever wanted a person i love came to see my performance, never as it happened before. For sure, this 3rd performance, my darling would come and watch our performance.

Well, let the story begins...

I woke up at 1.30pm, knew that it's about time to call Jordan and jamming at 3pm. He came and fetched me to cy's place and it's almost 3pm, Ck's still sleeping, soon me and Jordan went for lunch, then we go for jamming at 4pm. Keng's studio was crowded with the bands, talking and laughing while they're preparing for the gig. Yulius will be coming after 4pm, so we jammed first till when he arrived, we just got finished our practises. Unfortunate for him...

Then, we went back to cy's house to collect our instruments while i'll go to 3rd uncle's house to collect the Video Camera. Then we met at Paul's place, had dinner together. I took light dinner, a pack of Nasi Lemak, in case i'm full, i might not in good condition to play drums cuz i move around too much i might puke on myself.

(this is the paragraph proven that he might be wrong sometimes)

And so, cy asked me if i still remember the sequence, then it became a debate, cy pushed his luck so tight, i remember what he said about the sequence 2 days ago, and last minute changes upon the first song? He made a bet, who lost the debate will pay all the media expenses. Actually i wasn't afraid of losing this debate, i knew how the song goes, and the sequences. He hurried me about the cd reference and we listened back to the first track. While we're at it, he assumed that me and Ck's gonna pay for the expenses, aloud.. (hey, i know you're hating me saying this) We skipped the track till the sequence changed... And i was right about it, cy got muted, his face turned to a smiley. I knew he's wrong about it, only he can't accept it before we got it proven. I can't blame him, he wanted the perfection, the tolerance from us, so he got so uptight managing the whole thing and somehow he's lost. Everything became too rush for us before we decide to jam on weekdays. It's understandable, so don't feel bad about it. We all did our mistakes, try not to push too hard verbally next time, it hurts a lot man...

Then me and cy went to buy cassette tape and Hi8 tape. I found Hi8 tape and batteries for the recorder, only can't find the stupid 90 minutes cassette tape. I wonder why the last time i went to photo shops, they did sell cassette tapes, until now with the CD technology, they don't bother about cassette tapes anymore. I went 3 shops in OUG, nothing found, stupid photo shops. And we received a call that our sound check has begun, so we rushed back, informed my girl to buy some drinks and the cassette tape. Unlucky for her, she just reached to find a parking space, came with her brother, then she had to go out again. I'm sorry darling, it just happened in a short time giving you a short notice, anyway thanks for delivering the things we need, love you lots... Well, cy and jordan still owes me a rm20 Hi8 tape, rm4 for the cassette tape, rm5 for the batteries, and rm2-3 (not sure the price) Evian water for our band leader, 'specially requested'...
Got the cameras ready, sound checked, found out the chair for me was too high and it can't be adjusted, a little frustrated on me that i knew i might not performing well with low impacts on the bass drums. Basically if the seat was high, the proportion of the leg is not 90 degrees, it's about 45-50 degrees that it creates low impacts of the beats, if i'm gonna do a fast pace beat on bass drums, i would got myself tired easily. What my point is i'm used to 90 degrees, in jamming studio. I'm sure this is the worst seat i ever sat on.

Then the first intro band performing, all were so young and naive, but their songs like pop punk stuffs, the drummer was skillful, again the same problem, can't hear what the vocalist singing. However, they've done their best to put up a band with few songs.

And then, it's our time to perform on the stage...


My heart beats faster, getting warmer and warmer each time i saw myself walking to the stage with snare drum, drumsticks and cymbal, setting up and looking at my band members. Cy said we had a little time for the sound check earlier so we better set it proper by then. After a short while of sound check, we begun our song...

I knew i played well at first, and expected i'll screwed a bit later cuz i know either the drumsticks will break, or my timing went wrong. I saw Jordan's playing facing to me instead of the crowds, i knew they would get shy for their first time. I was nervous at first, not shy, then the drum set was partitioned with acrylic transparent plastic for a condensed sound from the drums, somehow the spotlights reflected the partition till i only see myself at it, can't see the crowds. Therefore, i'm fearless and kept on going on my drums.

On the climax part, i felt the distortion from Yulius's guitar was not as we expected, not the distortion! We've been discussing about it using clean guitar sound to make the distortion climax part, some other effects will be doing feedback as ambience of the piano playing part. It felt so odd that i'm sure the audiences felt differences of the music. Then i felt i hit too hard my jazz drumsticks broke! Damn, luckily it's still attached, untill the slow part i managed to change but a little fucked up. Cy didn't look at me, i think he knew i broke my drumsticks. Later on, i hurt my finger, hitted on the toms, bleeded and painfully numb, and still i can manage to play as it wasn't hurt. The floor tom was getting close to my leg, the ride cymbal was running away from it's position, so as the right crash cymbal. I realised that because the fucking floor was not layered with a carpet or something to surround the drum set, all the instruments ran out of positions. No wonder i can't reach the crash cymbals...


And of course, i felt a lot more differences from our studio practising, chords running out of tune, timing also out, so am i. The last song we're playing supposed to be in more distortion, i looked at Ck and Jordan, they stuffed their guitars on the amplifiers for the feedback and i heard none. Cy's bass heard perfectly heavy and clear, i liked it most. Yulius's Wah-Wah effect can be acceptable cuz the feedback did the thing. And the ending of the song... Suck... Not completely muted the way we agreed...


I was fully exhausted after the whole ending, smashing and rolling, i crouched on the stage with some deep breaths. Then we packed our instruments and went back to our seats. Then come the cons and pros, from friends to strangers, most of them said i played the best on drums, and some said the whole thing was good, and none of them saying Cy's piano, Jordan's Pei-Pa, Ck's bass, Yulius's guitar. I think my drums were just simple beats, Cy's piano got the sentimental mood, Jordan's Pei-Pa got the ancient chinese orchestra mood, Ck's bass got the consistency blend in every instruments, Yulius's guitar helped to do the background ambiences. That's all my point of view, everyone did their great effort without screwing up much during the performance. Anyhow, i'm glad, just glad to have more band members journeyed together to get the best out of ourselves... Most importantly, having fun together...

Eleanor was in tense, she told me she recorded the video after the repeat of the first song... Oh my god, that's a such a waste, i mean when i browse back the captures, the audio was perfectly recorded, no doubt it's better than a tape recorder which did a minor quality. The whole performance was slick, tight and good sequenced and only matters it taken only after the song started... Sigh... (i know you felt bad about this, Ellie...)

My girl took a few pictures... Forgive me of what i'm gonna say, usually taking pictures with flashes supposed to be taken in close shots, i doubt my girl just make use of the zooming lens to capture and the flashes were useless at that range. She should take more pictures so we'll have more posts on our upcoming project. Somehow i'm disappointed on the medias i requested, none did the right thing. And of course, i know you guys did your best, and so far you guys need some improvement on taking pictures and videos, just like how you watch a movie and see how the camera moves. Please forgive me of how i said bad things about you girls...

Kia Seng and Chi Siang came also, but not sure when they came, they've spectated our performance, that's really awesome. Jeremy came with his girlfriend also, bought us beers, we sat and chit chat about the performance. They felt good at our performance, i'm glad. Cy wanted to go Poppy, together with Jordan. He asked me if i wanted to go, and of course i don't want to, i need a good rest after the performance and also some quality time with my girl.

Later my girl wanted to fetch her brother back home, i followed her car to her place, then she fetched me back home, stayed overnight at my place.

The gig is just like a dream, i wanted to be there as earlier as possible but when it's over, i felt sad that it left earlier. For 2 years after we had our previous performance, i just hope the next one will be as short time as possible, so we're not slacked out from the underground scene...

The Most Tiring Week Ever!

Again, practising weeks by weeks can't really get ourselves prepared for the gig. Ck's been telling us there would be press and we have to be the best for our performance. Everyone's ok with the schedule, only Yulius would get the pain in the ass, then me, i'll get more verbal spank if i got late to work again, then Jordan, he starts work at 10am, usually it shouldn't be a big deal for his sleeping time, then cy, he has the ability to sleep less and wake up early for his work, also he could get tired, but hardly he could be as tired as me. (yeah yeah, i'm a lazy bastard...) Lastly, Ck's not employed, always has time to lepak and sleep, for him jamming at midnight, no problemo...

Randomly we played an hour, an hour and a half, and 2hours. Sometimes 11pm starts jamming, sometimes 12am (when i heard 12am, i begun to paranoid about my lateness for work).

I remembered Crawford came along one day, took some pictures of us jamming in the studio, but i don't know when, could be posted this issue previously. Only my girl never came along with us cuz i knew it'll be hard to fetch her back and forth during night time, she always yawn when 11pm comes.

Every after jamming, we'll go for drinks and some discussions on the sequences of the songs. I felt most of all changed, added more sequences and the length of the song has extended. And so i did screw up a little on my fucked up beats, cuz i hardly could have the time listening to it. Each and everyday, after jamming, i turned on my audio references and half way to it i dozed off. During work, i can't even put up music on my desk, our songs are heavy types, possibly disturbing my colleagues. After work, i got to listen a few, then have to go cy's house meet up. Then when i listened to what i need to, another changes came and somehow i got a little confused. I revised back and still cy thought i fucked up my beats again. That's so weird, he could be our leader, but he's much more ego to listen to us of what we're supposed to say about the changes. A few times i was scolded by him, nonetheless i need some time to coop up the beats. (please remember this paragraph, somehow i proved there's a mistake from cy.)

I'm late for work on Thursday, an hour late. Some excuses i made that my boss never really question me further until in the afternoon he asked me to sit down, listen to him of what he really needed to comment about me. My performance for the whole 2 months, zero substance, nothing could possibly impressed him. Also i've promised myself not to get late for work, my luck just faded, for sure i meant to be late at anytime. Hell i'm gonna be then...

Jordan and cy took leave on Friday, essential for us to do one last practise before the gig. Yulius couldn't be possible to leave his workplace for a day, and i haven't asked my boss. I supposed he'll scold me again for a day's leave... However, i did asked him on Thursday afternoon, telling him i'm taking half day leave in the afternoon. He looked at me, turned his eyes in another direction, then he agreed. Yay! i got my free time to spend on practising...

After Thursday night practising, i felt that i do need the whole day leave, cuz i'm so tired, 4 days in a row lacked of sleeping. Next morning, i sent a message to my boss telling him a whole day leave i'm gonna take and went back to sleep again. He never called back and i supposed i'm free at my will for a day...

(to be continued...)

My Car's Under Repair

A week ago, i've sent my car to EON's service centre at PJ near Jaya Supermarket, the place i bought the car, but i collected the car in Glenmarie, Shah Alam. Somehow i trusted my salesman to do my car's paperwork, i did pay him a lump sum of rm1100 for paying my roadtax and insurance, he never lied and helped me renewed it. Just after a few weeks i got my new roadtax, i met an accident...

I've told my accident case previously, so another part will be like a rounding trip for me.

I've sent my car to repair after 3 days of the accident, gathered all the documents. The following week, my salesman called me that i need to go there and put signatures to agree the repairs and claims. I went there about 4.30pm, using my colleague's car (ashamed of myself) and i couldn't find the right person who's in charge of my claims, he's not in, even my salesman was out working. So i've to find another insurance officer, an Indian guy with a same uniform but different colors from the rest came to me, again he repeated the same of what documents i should bring. I said it was all with my salesman. Then i excused myself, called my salesman and he guided me to his office and get my documents with a little help from his colleague. I rushed back to see that Indian guy. He checked through the docs, and found out my car grant was not updated, and my police report was not original.

There goes my nerves...

"WHAT THE FUCK?"

I don't have an updated grant. Actually i don't really understand with all sorts of documents they need, my salesman should have the documents they wanted. And of course, in order to pay my roadtax, i need my car grant. But i can't have it, only my salesman eligible to get it. But in this case, he couldn't get the latest copy for me, and that's so absurd...

So the Indian guy told me, i can get it faxed to him just simply a call to EON Finance. No doubt it's late to get the grant, so i've to skip that.
Then my police report was not
considered as a certified original copy, yet i bought it for rm2 and almost late for requesting it. Actually i don't really believe it, i look at it again and i realised it's not original... Was my salesman trying to bullshit me, or just that i never check my police report properly. It's a photocopy, so where's the certified photocopy?

I called my salesman, and all he got to say "I just give the one you gave me the other day..." Impossible, how could i gave him the one not certified, i really have the particular copy, never it's not a certified... However, i need to get another copy...

After i look through the other documents, found out my insurance policy changed from UniASIA to Kurnia... What the hell is going on here? Then i asked the insurance officer, he said it's the same, although different company. He also said Kurnia's policy rather delaying, it'll take up a month at least for the approval, maybe a lot of policy holders. That doesn't sound appropriate, the last accident in Kota Baru, Kelantan, i claimed UniASIA insurance and it took a week plus to approve and get the car repaired. Ok, now i've seen the dark side of an insurance company. The insurance officer advised me that i should leave the car 2 or 3 days until they called the Adjustor to come and get a rough figures of repairing cost.

Then, the insurance office wanted to see the damage. I brought him where i parked the car, he said he might request to change the whole damn door. The way i look at it, true enough to change the whole damn thing, impossible to hit it back to shape.

I felt it's such a waste of time, so i said to the insurance officer i'll get back to him next week, left in hurry because i'm late to send back my colleague's car. I reached my office at almost 6pm, my boss still in the office, doing some paperwork, my colleague was fine with me even though i'm late. So the following week, on Tuesday, my boss asked me to deliver some documents to few clients. He knew i don't have the car, and asked me how should i settle my tasks? Damn it, it's tough for me to decide that moment. I just said i'll think of something, packed up and took LRT. I thought maybe taking LRT will cut down my time, somehow going to Shah Alam, i've to take KTM Monorail.
Unexpectedly, the train got delayed 30 minutes due some transportation trains using the track. I've wasted much time, since i got no better idea, i called my dad. After a few things i told him, my uncle just happenly beside him, then my uncle advised me to get the car out and he'll get it done in a week time. On my way to Shah Alam, i've wasted the extra fare, took another LRT to reach the workshop, met the insurance officer and returned to me all the claim documents. I drove my car and hurried to send documents to my clients.

In the evening, my uncle called me to fetch my car to his place on that night itself. I'm glad his caring but he's much more nervous than me, same to my dad, eventually called me a day after a day. I'm still lacked of original copy of police report and photocopy of car grant. I told my uncle i'll send the car this weekend as i need to use for working, also gather all the remained documents.

First, i've to call up the finance officer, her name's Ira. I tried to call her many times in few days, usually her colleague asked me to call back, she's engaged on the other line, hasn't back from lunch yet. I do have my time, but i don't really want to waste my phone batteries anyway. Even i permitted to use the office's phone, but i rather using my own private line, i never wanted my office's staffs know too much about my cases.

Finally i contacted her, when i tried to ask a person to speak to, she'll ask me back who am i and where am i from. In that moment i felt she's kinda rude, also wasting my time telling her what i need (i'm not asking for an interview, damn it!) and she never let me know who's she... She just simply asked me to fax over my police report and she'll fax my car grant after she received it. Unlucky for me, the police report was still with my salesman previously, after i got the documents back, i don't get any chances to fax the police report. I got busy, running here and there, and of course, i'm not allowed to use the office's resources on personal issues. Since my boss's desk view was facing right in front of the photocopy machine and fax machine, so i've to wait until he's not in the office, then i can only secretly fax.

And finally, the Finance Officer sent back my car grant, this time i checked thoroughly, it's an updated grant.

So i still need my original copy of police report...

Secondly, there was a day, i don't remember when, i've to go somewhere in Sunway and Shah Alam again. So i went for lunch with my girl nearby her place, convenient enough for me to buy another police report, also the police station was nearby her place. The counter only starts at 8.30am in the morning till 12.30pm, afternoon 2pm till 3pm, we were early at 1.30pm and the queue was long. When i got the police report, i felt so relieved. On that evening after work, i sent my car and passed my documents to my dad.

Actually the whole story doesn't sound hassle enough to you, but if you've experienced it, you know what i really meant:


1. Wasting time (took leave just to do the damn claims)

2. Travelling for nothing (petrol? And mostly when i'm stucked in the traffic jam)

3. Wasting effort (make calls, rushed here and there just to get the approval)


That's so fucked up...

I don't know why i've to go through all this, is this a test of patience, or just some other purposes, either good or bad, my heavenly Father?

7th Jamming Session, My Cousin's Wedding, My P.A. Job & 8th Jamming Session

The most tiring weekend i ever been. Jamming at night, even given opportunity to work on Sunday as Freelance Production Assistant (for cy's company, KRU), My cousin's wedding dinner at Klang, after work with cy, again jamming... For all the words, torturing is suitable to fit this weekend...

So, it starts when Friday was a 2 hours jamming session, from 11pm to 1am. I got lots of fucked up beats, blame that i didn't concentrate, after all the accident cases unresolved. However, my face got healed soon enough, lightened my worries. I know our band leader was not happy about it, everyone's seems committed more to their day jobs, i was quite slacked up my job, a week's absent to work troubles my probation period. I'm sure i'll get verbal spank from my Boss...

Whatever... (Gotta be patience...)

After the jamming session, 3 of us, Jordan, me and cy stayed in cy's home watched 'Elephant', directed by Gus Van Sant, of movies like 'Good Will Hunting', came a true story of a High School assaulted by 2 depressing students. Some people watched this movie and may not be interested at the camera moves and lots of silences, basically this movie shows lots of skills and continuities. It's not what all the directors do, perhaps for Gus Van Sant, it's special. I don't know much more of how to give comments on movies, only cy could give a better one.

So the next afternoon, slept too much, Jordan sent me back, had lunch together, Prawn Mee Soup nearby my place, just to let him taste the best of it. Then my boss called, asked me to go his house collect something. My car was at the workshop, so i had to call my dad for car usage.

After the whole journey, collected something from my boss, i headed home, in a short while, i realised the time passed in haste, hurried myself to bath, changed to nice outfit and went to my parent's house, together we'll go Klang to attend my 5th cousin sister's wedding... And i was damn early, everyone's not prepared for the wedding dinner. If i knew earlier, i should've gone back to my place and take a short nap. Around 6.30pm, only we made a move to Klang... sigh... So the 2 hours got wasted without a rest...

I was with my sister's car, when we're almost at the restaurant, a girl called me and claimed herself a friend of that shithead who hit on my car's door. So we talked and she knew i reported the assault case to the police, asking how it happened. You know, i'm sick and tired telling bad things happened to me to all the people who wanted to know, i mean i don't even want to remember it, even though it left 2 scars on my face... So before ending our conversation, i urged her to tell her shithead friend come to confront his crime mistake in front of the policeman. Again i thought of cursing that shithead, as what i did previously of how i curse on people... It really works, when it fucks with me deeply...

Dinner's great, i hardly ate, drank lots of beers, my favourite Carlsberg, got myself drunk... Took some wedding dinner pictures, take a look...








Soon, my further plan after the dinner, go to cy's house to stay overnight for the next big day...

'Freelance Production Assistant'.

Before the wedding dinner, cy called me few times to ask if i'm interested working as a Personal Assistant on Sunday, filming Music Video for Anita Sarawak... Wow, i mean, yes of course, a part time job a day, cost me less spending on weekends, but earn more. Some details gone through, i felt it's ok to work, confirmed myself then.

So back to after dinner thing, i asked my dad to fetch me to cy's house. Cy's not home yet, Ck's at home, their mom went back hometown. Later on, Ck went out also, left me all alone at their place. Surfed internet, checked my mails and blogs. About an hour later, cy came back. Almost 2am and we still have discussion to do on tomorrow's work. 3am, we went to sleep.

5.30am we woke up, hurried ourselves to KRU, but no one's there. I felt extremely tired, after all the nights staying up late and slept for few hours. Soon, the crew came, so as the director, Johan. My tasks are runner, F&B and van driver. I packed all the things we need for the shooting and i drove with the crew to Cotton Club at Maju Junction.

Cotton Club is a Jazz Restaurant, they named it altogether 'Jazzaurant', quite cool and classy place. We reached there at 7am, unpacked equipments for settings, then cy asked me to go and find a international English newspaper, also buy a VHS tape. I found the newspaper in Sheraton Imperial, The Herald Tribune Times, only the matter was where the heck i'm gonna find the damn VHS in that hour? Nevertheless, i've used my 1 and a half hour journeyed Chow Kit, Pertama Kompleks, Sogo part, Kompleks Wilayah, and some other places. Got my feet overwhelmed walking, so tired and full of sweats. Then finally i don't have to buy the damn tape in the moment, got back to the set and started to serve the crews and local superstars.

Then, Anita Sarawak came with her husband Mahathir and her make-up artist. They went to change their set costumes and the shooting started. The moments of the shootings were interesting, i can see there are different takes, angles and location. Even they've some sort of acting to blend in the intro of the Music Video. It took about few hours for the singing part with the jazz band together, until lunch time. I'm the one who went to buy and carried 15 meals and 20 packets of drinks, so heavy and quite a distance to carry around.

For the whole morning, i got myself scolded badly, because i didn't answer calls for few times. One, i put my phone in vibrate mode, once i'm walking i can't really feel it vibrates. Two, even i put back vibrate mode, if i accidently bang my phone onto something, it'll turn off just like that, automatically. Three, i was carrying food and drinks in full hands, and i can't answer the phone while i'm at it. These three reasons won't get me anything, but i remember how it happened, at least. In this line, phone calls receiving is so much essential that possibly i don't answer it, i wouldn't know they still need something for the set while i'm out. Time is not enough for a day's shoot, cuz i know.

Norman and Yusri came to the set too, a short visit to Anita. I mean, they're the boss, they have their serious look, and how would you feel while watching your boss performing live on stage?

I guess you know what am i talking about...

After lunch, i've to send the music instruments back to Sri Hartamas, a shop do rentals, sales and lessons on music instruments. I was there at 3.30pm, funny thing is the shop opens in normal hours daily except Sunday, 4pm till 9pm... I guess it wasted my little time to go back to the set earlier. I've checked out the drumsticks, the cheapest they're selling rm60+, i mean wow, i think i'll stick with Woh Fatt at Jln Silang, cheap and more selections.

And i went back to the set again, the location changed for the intro shooting of the Music Video. That time i don't have to stay at my station, helping out the crew carrying equipments and setting up. The Spotlight generator was so heavy, most of the time i carried around, got me even more tired. Somehow the settings test on camera, me and cy pretended we're the stars, acted in a short while. Then comes the stars to do the shots.

Lastly, before dinner time came, the last shots of interviews and minor acting for the music video. Then we all packed up, went back to KRU to unload stuffs, left me and cy to send back the video camera's add on equipments back to Damansara. Later on i've to fetch I-Meng, then together we went to Jam Studio for our practises.

Another 2 hours of jamming, while I-Meng's playing his new bought Sony PSP. The graphics cuntet, but he only had one game, 'The Lord of the Rings Tactics'. After the jamming, we planned to have more practises on weekdays too, starting on Tuesday night. I'll be damned jamming in midnight, my car was in the workshop, so every weekday morning i've to get up so early to catch an early bus.

In the meanwhile, Jordan was the one fetching me back and forth everyday for the jamming sessions. I owe him big time for his effort.

Thus, this fucking weekend got me late for work on Monday! What the heck, i've earned a double wages comparing my permanent job's a day. Anyhow, i've paid it all to my darling, as she helped me paying for the accident last Monday...